All Is Well.
Before we get into this blog, I hope you're well. I pray you entered into this year surrounded my love and light. I pray you are resting, reflecting, revitalizing, and recharging in this season. I pray you allow yourself to be soft-- that you offer yourself grace. I pray that you go within and love on the parts of you that need a little extra love and care. I pray that you don't run from yourself but instead honor yourself for how far you've come, despite all that has happened... despite all of the grief. I pray you see the good that still is. I pray that you see the favor in waking up every day. I pray you find gratitude in the little things. I pray that you be a vessel of love and that love greets in you every rising and holds you tight at sunset. I pray that you carry peace in your pocket. I pray that you follow your heart and tend to your passions. I pray that you water your gifts in fertile soil for a beautiful bloom in spring. I pray you open your heart and mind to God, and that you follow discernment and intuition. I pray you see things as they are and allow God to take you where you need to go. May God be your center. May you be well, always. All ways.
Okay, let's get into it! Welcome back to my writing corner.
--
I wish you a love the only considers you
I wish you a love the feeds you according to your love type
I wish my love still reaches you and calls you by your name in the climax hour of your sleep, reminding you to do well by love
To do well with love
To respect love
And to hold on to this love better than you held onto mine
May love always choose you ...
......
~Be Well, Love, Brittany K.W., January 6, 2024
One day, you can have this whole vision of how your life will be. You envision reaching certain milestones in your life with certain people there with you. You plan to go to certain places with certain people because you envision experiencing certain parts of life with them. You plan to build a life with people because you love them. Because certain things about them make sense to you. Because they're a key piece in your puzzle. Because more things are right about them than are wrong, and even the things that may be wrong ain't really that bad. And then one day, something changes without your permission, and you can't seem to make sense of it. But somehow, you're supposed to put the puzzle back together.
And even though you never pictured yourself moving on, one day you'll realize you're not in the same place of sadness. You make room for grief and forwardness in the same breath. And you realize the people that surround you in this season were the people you needed for the ways of life in the present.
And that is God's reminder, that even when you cannot see it, all will always be well.
--
Bedford Stuyvesant, December 2023
"You want agave or maple syrup on your waffles, today, Baby?"
"Maple syrup, please and thank you. And can I please get a chocolate kiss from my love on the side?"
"I can give you more than a chocolate kiss, let alone one," he said as he walked over to Melody sitting at his kitchen island, swooning over the beautiful piece of art that stood before her.
Marcus was Melody's reminder that God's hands were perfect. Everything about him was perfect to her. His height. The definition in his jaw line. The thickness of his bottom lip that always made kissing him her favorite thing to do. The curve and definition of his spine. His hands and the way they cupped her beautiful brown miniature backside, and her heart.
They'd been in a relationship for a year and a half now, and Melody was spending the week after Christmas at his place, taking advantage of her unlimited PTO. The holidays were Melody's favorite time of year, and this would be her first New Year's Eve with Marcus, having gone to Jamaica last year with her girlfriends.
After setting down her plate and utensils, Marcus held Melody's face in his hands, adjusting the angle so he could look into her soul through her mocha brown almond-shaped eyes.
"You know you are the most beautiful woman in the world to me, and I'm proud so proud to be your man."
He moved his hands to the sides of her head to tilt her head down, planting a kiss at the center of her head.
"I don't know a stronger woman than you, but I do pray you don't have to be that strong in 2024."
Marcus was referring to the grief and loss Melody had experienced during the year. Family mishaps were shaking the foundation of her existence. Friends she thought would be around for a lifetime were now at a distance, while new ones that inspired her were arriving in waves. God was cleansing Melody's world to make room for all that was meant to be, but the grief that came with it was grueling.
"Babe, it isn't even 12:00, and I am not trying to cry, but I love you and I thank you."
"I love you more," he said, giving her the kiss she had been waiting for.
"You didn't make yourself a waffle. What are you going to have for breakfast?"
"I'm going to go down to the gym first. I'll have some avocado toast when I come back."
Melody was looking at her waffle in guilt, but then, at Marcus in disdain because why would this man not ask me if I wanted to go to the gym knowing I need my ass to grow.
"You want to know why I didn't ask you, I see it all in your face," he said remixed with subtle laughter. "You have your sacred sister Sunday zoom call with the girls in 23 minutes to be exact. You wouldn't have enough time to do both, but if you want to go later, I'll go back with you."
Melody had completely forgotten about the call that her and her sisters have the last Sunday of every month to reflect, unpack and let go, but Marcus didn't. He tended to not forget much of anything when it came to Mel. She was his one chance to prove to love that he meant every promise he made to God when he asked for love to visit him one more time. So, he takes his time with Mel. He listens. He keeps a notepad filled with her favorite things and random places or things she says in passing.
If Marcus could right every wrong in Melody's life, he would, but he honors her humanness and allows her to live within the safety that is his presence while still being free.
"Thank you for always remembering the little things," she said to him, laying her head at the center of his vessel, placing her hands, one above the other, on the base of spine that holds up his 6'3 frame. The bar stool never gave her the height she thought it did, standing at 5'2 on her own two feet.
"Thank you for trusting me with the little things about you and allowing me to see the parts of you that you hide from the rest of the world."
"Aht! Aht! We're not doing that!"
"Yes. Yes we are," he said taking a step back to stare at the woman before him, the one who held his heart. "You've been superwoman this year. You had to grieve living people. You've had to make hard transitions. You knew heartbreak in countless ways, yet and still you showed up as everything for everybody-- without recognition, and I just want you to know that somebody sees you."
"Marcus! You're supposed to be going to the gym."
"I'm your lover first, and nobody's going to give my woman her flowers before I do on the last day of this year."
Melody laughed at the sight of her man trying to out win her sisters, but she also appreciated every word coming from the man who had been her answered prayer. This year had almost defeated Melody in so many ways, but at every turn was Marcus, holding her fragile pieces together and reminding her that all would always be well.
And he was never wrong. From losing her childhood friend to unnatural causes, to the transition of her grandfather, to losing friends who were still living, to moving out of the apartment she had grown to love and call home, Melody knew grief in every form. But every night, there was Marcus and a prayer. There was a home cooked vegan meal plated to perfection on his kitchen island with a glass of Cabernet or iced seltzer water, or a dinner date at a new restaurant he saved in his folder titled "Date Nights for Baby" on Instagram.
And, sure, there was a balance in between them cooking. Melody loved to be in the kitchen, too, but acts of service was Marcus' love language, and something he took pride in was his new repertoire of vegan recipes he learned and developed for his love. He learned food was a healing balm for Melody, and he was as intentional about her healing as she was.
"Baby."
"Yes, my love."
'Thank you. For reminding me that God exists. For reminding me to give love a chance day after day after day. For being a safe place for my grief. For reminding me that God answers prayers and believes I deserved the love of my dreams the ways I thought I did," Melody uttered with little room for breaths in between.
Tears were breaking the levees bordering the eyelids of two lovers who waited forever to experience such a love.
"Thank you for always reminding me that all is well. That love is a healing balm. That love is the very thing that keeps us afloat. Thank you for not running from me in a year filled with grief, but instead coming closer and loving on every piece of me-- whole or shattered. Thank you."
"Thank you for letting me," he replied, planting a kiss on the four focal points of her face in a clockwise manner before landing at her lips. "I promise to always pray for you. I promise to be your reminder that there is love after heartbreak. That someone will find the beauty in scattered pieces. That someone will help you put yourself back together. That love chooses you daily. That all is well when you've got love. And I promise to always be that someone."
--
So Beloved, I hope you find your person-- be it a lover or a friend. Someone who reminds you of the good that still is. Someone who loves you in your grief and holds you together until you feel alright again. Someone who reminds you that all is well, even when it feels like it isn't-- because it is. God wouldn't have it to be any other way.
And should you have lost something or someone in this new year, I pray you remember that God is not through blessing you, and that every loss comes with some form of gain.
I love y'all.
Talk to you soon. xo- BrittanyK.W.🌹